Chick Gazing : A Constructive Hobby

Stop the car
my friend wants to take a look at the girl who just walked passed our vehicle.
No he doesn't want to know her name
that would be a little dangerous
he just wants to confirm the color of her scarf
please stop the car.

Hey don't you worry if it's one way
and don't notice the car if it swerves
he wants to catch her before she goes down the subway
yes he's smitten by her curves.

Mr. Driver don't you understand we all are in the middle of a debate
one says her hair were black and short another says long and straight.
Do apply the brakes then Mister before these fellows come to blows
for nobody out here has any clue about the length and the hue no one knows.

My dear friend out here noticed the girl from a bloody good distance
when in normal cases he can't figure out the signboard at arm's length
God knows these wenches they trigger an explosion in him
which in turn boosts his vision's strength.

He said she was wearing a pink shirt and over it a light fur coat
I mean is this girl for real , wearing a coat in summertime
or was my friend hallucinating , after all he took a Nimulid that morning
but then consuming painkillers isn't a crime.

Although it is said that limbs shoudn't be hung outside moving vehicles
when it comes to girls ,guys throw all caution to the wind
when passing through a female infested road
his body sticks out as if his neck is stuck to a rind.

Hey Driver pull over and get out I 'll drive the car myself
I don't want your reluctance to ruin his chance
after all he wants is a quick glance.

Move aside and let me put on the reverse gear
look she's already running away
may be she thinks my friend is a hooligan
I don't blame her , he should mind that stare.

I don't want to say this but I think it isn't too bad a thing this
staring at girls who walk right past without ever giving a smile
who cares if they call it rude ("who says that?" my friend asks )
and should guys abstain merely because it is futile?

It is quite an interesting activity this and constructive too
especially for those who like to spend their time in malls and busy streets
I don't mind their alacrity myself , it inspires me to emulate Keats,
and I end up writing a few lines for the benefit of all my friends
who have in spite of all the bickering have successfully failed to make amends.

I can no longer think straight

I can no longer think straight
thinking straight has made me insane.
The more I come closer to thinking straight
the more twisted my life becomes.
The future of this life now depends
on how quickly my mind relinquishes prudence
and my sanity is pleading with me to do it quick
before I lose it and with it all that I love.

Misplaced the heart

I agree that I loved you once
but was careless at the start
unwittingly thus
I misplaced your heart.

I wrote to you many a time
you chose to close your eyes
and when I told you the truth
you chose to call it a lie.

You said what I wrote was too long
and made no sense to you
and yet I can swear on the holy book
what I wrote was all for you.

I know should have have kept it someplace safe
but I guess I wasn't that smart,
as a result of that little folly
I misplaced your heart.

Years are going by don't really know how to tell you
that I write whatever I do just for your sake,
if you choose to ignore it I can't help it
but then you can at least be fake.

Sometimes fake affection
can help someone like me
who's been denied love from whom he wishes
and get elated for free.

You can say that I lost it
but that's not an art
I had kept it alongside mine
when it broke I misplaced your heart.

A Seriously lame excuse

Get me a ticket which shall buy me a place in the best row
of the auditorium.
Don't waste too much time in talking to the sales girl.
Look the crowd has already started flowing in
in a while there hardly be would be any free air.
Get me wafer and get some cola
I don't drink so don't bother buying beer
I won't repeat my instructions
yes buddy the message is clear.
Go over to the fruit centre and get me a fresh and juicy pomegranate ,
I don't like sweets so don't you bring me that chocolate bar.

What a day

Let's decide whether we want to give it up
or do we want to make it up
or may be just throw it all way
what a day!

Should we patch up
or should we split
should we just walk away
what a day!

Let's play cheerful music
let's not waste time in fooling ourselves
let's not have it any other way
what a day!

Take out those stale pieces of bread
and give them to the men in red
we couldn't catch them while they were away
what a day!

Mix it up don't be afraid
it cannot be any other way
or we shall have to pray
what a day!

what a day in autumn time
what a day the winters' around
and I am ready to play
oh! what a day

You know these are Desperate times
But I know my heart's still mine
I have it all if I have hope
and shall have it come what may
what a day!

I have no idea why I wrote this

I have no idea why I wrote this
absolutely none.
Perhaps I wrote this because I had plenty of time
and nothing better to do.
But that still doesn't answer my question
that why did I choose to employ my spare time
in writing this than to have done any other thing.
The questions which come up before our eyes and force us
'to examine as to why we did this or did that
have no answers which can satisfactorily explain them.

A Lawyer's Journal Entry for March the 5th , 2011

Today I duped another unsuspecting fellow
and that has made me quite mellow,
but when he offered to pay me half the fee
I got disturbed , future emoluments are not my cup of tea.

I can live with adjournments I can live with delays
but money should be instantly paid.

My black coat bears on it
a long list of grievances and complaints
as also a whole lot of promises made
don't remember what became of them.

I am not loved I know this fact

not my fault , all a part of the act.

I don't like being a liar

though I like being called one

it adds to my importance and my esteem.

I don't dislike people calling me names

for they are better than my real one.

I am just just a guy making his living

why all this hue and cry?

I have always followed this motto in life

live simple and think high.

This is exactly what I do when I conduct my daily affairs

for simple drafting and arguments

I contemplate receiving high fares.

I still insist I am not a thug,

there are plenty of them already out there

I am just a simple man making my living

an existence almost thread bare.

Those who point fingers at us

should first analyse their own selves

and if they accuse us of swindling and manipulating

they should first clean their own shelves.

In this material world where there's a price

for everything there is under the sun

don't blame me for being what I am

I am just another one.

Once a Loser Always a Winner

It took me twenty odd years to realize this fact
and now that I have I had better act
to spread around the word for the benefit of my brothers
not that it won't prove useful if adhered to by the others.

It's time to forget how to do the best you can
for once you do it you'll be the man
and every time a venture crops up for completion
your name will come up for automatic admission.

If you want to take no part of the blame
if you never want to know the meaning of shame
if your heart craves for rest and peace
if you don't want work but want that fees.

Listen to these words of wisdom my friends
and act before it's too late make amends,
for there is a wise old saying to support what I say
and perhaps that's the reason you should follow this way....

Once a loser always a winner
Never doubt how true this is
once a loser always a winner
that's the secret of eternal bliss.

Once you show that you are good for nothing
no boss will ever come up to your desk
and say with a condescending air
that "Hey buddy do your best"

You'll be given your own little space
and you can always make up a constipated face
they won't bother you not for anything in the world
no obligation , accusation at you shall be ever hurled.

Once a loser always a winner
Many wise men have lived that way
Failure is the key to success
I have often heard them say.

If failure is the key to success
then soon all the treasures you shall possess.
For to open the treasure chest
you should either have the key
or you should be the bloody best.

Once you are tagged as a loser my friend
no fault to you will ever accrue,
and if by chance you do something constructive someday
you'll be hailed- the hero of the crew.

If the mission fails you won't be counted
when the time comes to pass the blame.
When the whole damn office is slogging around
you can follow the match without any guilt or shame.

Rather , your colleagues will mind, if you lend a hand
such generosity they would never stand,
for they'll be used to your uselessness by then
and once they get used to a thing or two
they won't have it any other way, oh yes !such are men.

So at the beginning of the year
or better still of the career
declare this fact in unequivocal terms
that expecting work and quality from you
would be like serving disinfectants to germs.

There are plenty of folks working around
why should we bother running around
reluctance is our daily prayer,
work load, I am sorry we can't share.

If anyone dares to give you any work
you employ your reputation and your quirk
If that doesn't work though I think won't fail,
of callousness and incompetence do leave a trail.
And if I am worth half my salt
he would very soon realize his fault.
I bet he would then quickly retreat
and by his own vigour and labour would then the task complete.

It is because of the sincerity of such fine chaps
that we don't need to chew but get some easy paps.
Their quest for excellence I truly appreciate
and never against a hard worker will I discriminate.



Once a loser always a winner
If you work hard you won't be called a saint
if you don't you are not a sinner
Once a loser always a winner
the line between vice and virtue
just became thinner.

Laziness gets a brand new home

The socks drying on the sofa

weren't actually supposed to be there

but I didn't feel like picking them up.

The papers scattered on the floor

were supposed to be in the chests

but why bother picking them up.

There is no confusion in my life

when it comes to doing the daily chores

I get lazy as you like and that is all.

The smart little cellphone lying on the bed
should have been plugged in for power

The chap I see in the mirror

should have already been in shower

There is no day when I don't worry

about the time which soon will come

when I'll have to slog it out

or I won't be paid a any sum.

The closet where my clothes are kept

is quite unkempt

You can't tell the lower from the jacket

they all look the same to me

and it's only when I uncrumple them that

they tempt.

I havn't washed my jeans for months

what do I care?

I bought it when it looked light blue

now it's a little darker than Delhi's air.

Once on a weeked a ventured out for a trek

and with the mud the shoes got soiled

I even managed to skid on the hill

as a result the shirt got spoilt

Why to wash it

when it won't harm anyone

except for may be the hostess out there

who won't want dirty shoes to make way into the layer

The books lying in a towering pile
should have been on the shelves
the mantelpiece which is quite out place on the flowerpot
should have been with the elves
The jeans are not pressed the shirt isn't ironed
but I read somewhere they can do without it.
There's a little dust which has accumulated on my dvd player
Why do we have to clean up things, life isn't fair.

There is a small hole in my socks but I won't change them
If the sheets are lying unnoticed why should I arrange them
Shaving your beard is a cumbersome thing
why can't they let us grow it?
Why do we have to change the tyre
shouldn't we be allowed to tow it?

Who needs to hurry up when there's no particular good in it?
Why should we catch the first local ?
Heaven's gates are not going to be closed.

Let me dry my hair in the sun
don't hand me a dryer.
There's no bomb waiting to be diffused
I don't have to cut any red wire.

Why should there be long queues outside eateries ?
why do they wait for hours just to eat and it's not even free!

The moment the train arrives they make a dash for the door
I hate this silly habit....completely abhor
There's no one chasing your asses and your seats are reserved
and there is no prize for reaching there first
I haven't seen anyone who deserved.

When the same train stops at the station
and they know it's the last stop
they still run for the door
some run , stumble and some hop.

That poor door is just 4 feet wide
and their waists aren't twenty four
what's the need to make haste
it makes waste now we know for sure.

In a function where a buffet is served
they keep lingering by it's side
when the covers they open for consumption
they converge on them like a tide.

Oh! Yes the food may run out
and to be sure they don't get food at home
it's for the first time they have seen those dishes
and may be it's their last time to hog
before they get deported from Rome.

Always in a hurry
on roads in offices and in bed
how will they ever rest in peace
they'll be called the hurrying dead.

Scampering past the barricades to hear the leader speak
breaking queues in temples to His blessings seek.

I don't recommend hurry no Sir
except when you get Nature's call
and when you go to attend it
take it easy and finish it all,
there's no Nobel prize waiting for you
if you pee in haste
and don't you excrete with an alarm bell
no time you will waste.

Listen up when you take your bath
use up little water but a lot of time
use up an hour to massage your head
don't worry it is no crime.

Yawn as if it were a sacred ritual
smile for at least 7 minutes in a go
when you eat chew as if you are a camel
the office will still be there
it has no place else to go.

Sleep like a log
rest like a dog
and rise up like a dale.

Laziness is actually a virtue
which the intolerant call a vice
if you can be just a little lazy
you won't even have to pay the price.

Newer Older Folks

Can we play around in the dark
while the light peeks in through the hole.
Is it true that our visual purple would take a few minutes to help us out.
There was a sack which was the block
over which stumbled many a young colt.
The lower the rug slipped
the higher the bolt came.
Everyday and every night the stars talked to us
during the day they talked through the sky
at night through our eyes.
When you are in the vicinity of pubescent girls
and are rubbing shoulders with raw green lads
the face by itself breaks into a smile.
To tell truth from those lies
we need a toddler's eyes.
To get along with life
we need to embrace innocence.

Fetch the Turnip

It's round and round and round , it tapers
it's tall like those sky scrapers.

You can't miss it can you?
if you don't close your eyes,
last week it was in the papers.

Downsizing is the norm nowadays,
it has been brought about by our foolish ways
of spoiling things till they can't be spoilt more
do you think we still have plenty of days?

Move aside this bed 's not yours
sleep on the floor I don't care
I just want this mattress all entirely for me
you have no business here.

Drop your pants they belong to me,
remove that shirt and untie your hair,
wash your face you still smell of that cologne
that you stole taking it to be a perfume
and sneaked it out along with the chandelier.

You are a thief, I want to be alone
don't you steal anything which I own.

Fetch it, common fetch it now
it may run away , it runs a little fast.

Turned against me

What if I commit myself to a mental asylum
and go on a wild self destructive spree
would all all of you then who were near me
begin to avoid and escape and fear me?

If I let go of everything I have,
would it count for nothing?
Can you give up what you have
is it in you control?

What if I choose insanity
while I am perfectly sane?
What if I choose profanity
and have no fear or shame?
would I be the one responsible
would I be the one to blame
is it really under my control
or is it just a part of the game?

They all tell me that I should be happy
there is nothing I should be worried about
life is beautiful it is lovely
and it will all surely work out.

What if I change the costumes
and on a beach wear a fur coat
what if I take out the bermudas on a glacier,
when in the desert wear a raincoat.
Would they call me crazy,
would they call me insane.
would they stop coming near me
and would I be the one to blame?

They all say I am not bold
don't have have courage
that's what I am told
If however I take a step
they would pull me down
If I be a little bold
they'll have a frown.

What if I decide that I do not want to live at all
do you think they'll chastise me
for being a coward , lunatic and all?
Let me just put my head down
on the desk that lies still
sleep till sleep abandons me if it ever will.

What if I commit myself to a psychiatrist's
and let him with my mind play around
what if I choose to sit around all day
while the shrink tries to pin me to the ground.

I am not averse to any opinion that's converse
I just want some clarity
just want some direction it may then be perverse.

Hi , Hello , ok it's time to go now
it's time to go.

Sunshine and the Hotel

Marble on the floor,
carvings on the door,
comes the footman with a roar,
sunshine will bless this place.

Grab her from behind,
take the money and go,
don't you be in a hurry to get her,
I pray , be slow.
Sunshine will bless this place.

I caught him in the act
he had no reason to be scared
for he hadn't done anything
to do what no else had ever dared.

I closed my eyes
I let him be.
She was lying in his arms
you see.

I closed the door
and left on my toes,
though when she saw me
she rose,
sunshine will bless this place.

Some say that love made them sane
and some they loved but in vain.
They loved the moonlight
but the clouds they came.
They loved the sun
but it rained,
just close your eyes
hold her tight
sunshine will bless this place.

Rose water rolling down the skin
fair and waxed
could see the lip stick in the bin
worry not , there's more here
I won't hurt you I swear,
sunshine will bless this place.


Down she goes , down that road
I am being driven by her goad,
he says beware, long way to go
but he doesn't know what I know
There may be boundaries which
may stop me in my stride
there may be walls , her face they may hide
All I know is sunshine will bless this place.

What's wrong with Doping?

Call up the W.A.D.A. Chairman,
and ask him to close down his shop.
Just stop this sham, once and for all.
What's wrong with doping
when games are now merely entertainment programs,
and sportsmen but highly paid performers?
Have you ever concerned yourself with the fact whether
SRK dopes before he acts?
Unless people use prohibited drugs which are addictive
they should not be censured for using those
performance enhancing drugs.
How does it matter?
If entertainment is the only object
why not let them do what they want.
What good does a sprinter do to the world, that we should be
so concerned about him.
If a guy can run fast, how the hell does it help me with my daily bread?
If I find watching his races to be an stimulating activity what's the point in regulating that guy's behaviour?
Doping would have been relevant had these sports been a matter of pride and honour....but as things stand, there's no honor there only money and professional competence.

So why to be hypocritical, an athlete taking P.E.D is by no means an antisocial activity
unless it is glamorised and leads to youngsters becoming addicted to them. But that won't happen. Because no one wants to run for his livelihood nowadays, everyone wants a management degree, God knows , to manage what.

The designer Man

I have got designer shoes
Designer socks ,Designer Underwear
I have designer this I have got designer that
a designer smile and a stare.

When I step out into the designer street
I feel the designer air
When I give her the designer kiss
she caresses my designer hair.

There's a designer bar a designer car
and a chauffeur to take me there
If the cop he catches me, mind you designer he is
I have got a designer one line prayer.

Hanging out in groups of three
we drank till we dropped dead
some of us just couldn't get enough
so to the bar they got wed.

They had a designer way
of going astray
and a bad breath , let's be clear
that they may not return sober sane
to their homes yes this was the fear.

Packed up a designer sub
stuffed it it with a diet coke,
stopped at the service counter
and puked all over the bloke.

A designer bell in his designer home
to announce " ya I am here"
I ain't never gonna drink and drown
I am not going anywhere.

The gates of hell don't want no fashion
and heaven thrives on simplicity
out here I am the man
got every toy right here in my kitty.

It's seduction time and it ain't no crime
If you love designer wear
Just remember this that there is no bliss
till you smoke a johnny player.

So get up my friend and join the trend
dispose off those shabby clothes
It's time to get designer now......

Master Shameless

NO one really knows
why he grew that beard
no one really knows
why he's so weird.
He speaks in low monotones,
in a voice that 's not his,
he has got no glamour about him
yet he makes money in showbiz.

Master shameless just tell me who you are!
I want to be like you, drive that long long car.

He doesn't care if he gets his meals on time,
he doesn't mind if he has to commit a crime,
He has his hands full of those sins he stored there
he is always wandering , oh he's there no he's here.

Master Shameless please tell me who you are!
I want to be like you, want to drive that long long car!
I want to live a life that I can look upon with no shame,
and if you like it with a dozen people to blame.

Where can I get a suit like you?
Where can I get that cologne?
Master tell me is it all right to be with you?
or should I do it alone?

Get aside don't tell me what to do,
I am old enough to be my own boss,
Get aside don't bother me no more,
don't get mad and get cross.

Master tell me who you are
I want want to drive that car
I know how to drive
have got a license
just tell me how to be a star.

Master who am I?
why don't I sing?
Why do I fumble in your presence?

I am shameless and I know that
do tell me how to be bold.

Why don't I get along
with the genteel folk
why don't I get along
with the society's yolk?
It isn't that I don't try ,
yet that smile so wry!!!!!!!!

Who are you?
tell me what to do.

Who are you?
just tell me what to do!!!!!!

Don't leave me alone here
there a lot of them polite people
they'll Kill me and sell my soul
you know to that devil


Just give up and tell me your name
before i do anything stupid
Just climb on top you car!!!!
and tell me who you are!!!!!!!!!

Nobody knows why he grew a beard
nobody knows why he';s so weird.
Master is here , he 's not gonna go
master don't tell me to go slow

tell me tell me yell me tell me
who you are? who you are?

The muddy path beside the road

A chilly morning, but the Sun promised me that it would be a pleasant day. I trust Him , so I ventured out. The dew drops still clung on to the green leaves, the blades of grass could still have moistened my calf muscles had I decided to go through the field. But I didn't.
Some red colored flowers were waiting for me down the road . The road black,the flowers red. It didn't seem awkward, though it would have, had a girl worn a red bonnet over a black blouse. But she didn't.
The Moon for some reason had forgotten to retreat back into His den. Why , I don't know. But He hadn't.

For early spring the weather was indeed resplendent ,what with multicolored flowers, green grass, bright sun and no sign or sensation of any heat. My back was warm but it had more to do with the hot water bath than anything else. Soon it will be become warm because of the blood which is flowing so smoothly through my veins. Even he knows that spring is here.

The birds I met on the way were looking quite cheerful. I know this because they were sitting quite casually on the branches, not getting bothered by my presence.

The road was to go on forever but I bade it goodbye when the milestone which read >< 20 met my eyes. It was time to do down the hill and meet some people who lived there and had done so for the last so many years.
When the urban feet of a city dweller touch the soft earth in a village , the brain sends a signal to the hands to spread wide open ; it's natural. After sometime the brain realises that the earth out there is more solid and dependable than it is in the city, where it has been covered with hard black things that we eventually call roads. To see the sun coming out from behind the trees as the whole scenery lit up, was quite a scene. So the muddy path took me into the habitation of humans who lived there and had done so for the last so many years.

The hamlet was indeed quite small. The houses were embedded between green spaces and tall trees. Had it been a city street it would have worn a deserted look. but being in the country side the whole scene looked quite idyllic. On could see the cattle grazing calmly on the hillock and the small shepherd boy nibbling away on his bread quite contentedly . When I went near him he smiled a little and stood up to stand in a posture which signified his shy nature. Soon came other villagers who had no qualms about me wearing a unbranded t-shirt or a worn out jean. Not one of them cared for the dirty shoes I was wearing. After talking with them for some time I felt that we city dwellers had done irreparable damage to their peace of mind by demeaning their simplicity and glorifying our ostentatious duplicity. I decided to walk down a little further and soon encountered a young man , of about my age, who greeted me warmly and indulged me in 5 minutes worth of conversation regarding the village and it's surroundings. I still remember that day when I had curtly refused to give proper directions to a fellow city dweller as I had to get to work early. But when you are out here you no longer feel that hurry is or can be a part of life. Time moves as quickly here as it does out there but then it is the pace which the people set which actually makes the clock tick at leisure.